Atrociously late update

Adam has been back nearly a month, and I am finally posting an update on his return. Pathetic, I know.

The demobilization ceremony April 22 was lovely and intimate because it related only to Alpha Battery and Golf Company of 2/218th Field Artillery. The ceremony was in Forest Grove, Ore., also the location of the battalion's headquarters. Gov. Ted Kulongoski spoke, and though he might have provided empty promises, he brought a tear to my eye. I do believe he supports the troops, but some things are out of his control. Patricia played family coordinator, greeting attendees, and later got to sit int he VIP section. Adam's aunt Joyce Ann also attended. (For more photos of the ceremony, see my Flickr page.)

The day after the ceremony, Adam and I left for a weekend trip at the beach. We went to Seaside, Ore., and chilled mostly, hanging out, eating sushi, walking on the beach. We shopped as well, of course. :) I found a mug that says "Stud Puffin," and that is Adam's designated mug at my house. After leaving Seaside, we planned to go to the Tillamook cheese factory, then head home. Upon arrival, we found that Adam's truck was leaking transmission fluid. One more night at the beach it is. The truck couldn't be fixed immediately, so we rented a car and went home, and Adam returned later in the week to retrieve his truck.

That weekend, Adam's parents threw him a homecoming party, and many family members attended, including some from Canada. Adam did a slide show of photos from Iraq and explained his work there. It was great that so many of his family members showed up, showing their love and support.

For the past couple of weeks, Adam has been setting up his apartment. He got a place in Clackamas, Ore., near Target, Petco and the mall -- perfect for me! He bought a giant TV, a leather couch set and a king-size bed -- maybe he will no longer sleep diagonally, though I'm not banking on it. I find it ironic that before he left, I lived in Clackamas and he in Milwaukie, Ore., and now we're switched.

That about sums it up. He won't be returning to work until mid-June, probably after our Las Vegas trip. He will be gone about three weeks during the summer for a military class. Everything is slowly becoming normal again.

Correction: I lied. He won't return to work until August because he has a military class in July that lasts three weeks, so it seems pointless to return to work for two weeks, then leave again for nearly a month.

Busy and lazy

I will at some point post an update and pictures about Adam's homecoming. As you might imagine, I have been busy spending time with him. But know that he is home, safe and still kind of wonderful. :)

We've set a date!

Most of the 2/218th Field Artillery, of which Adam is a member, will not be home in time for Wednesday's demobilization ceremony in Portland, so they are getting their own ceremony Thursday in Forest Grove, Ore. Originally they were to get no ceremony, but there was major backlash, so the Guard relented.

Thursday's ceremony will be at noon at Forest Grove High School, 1401 Nichols Lane. The troops are expected to arrive at 11 a.m., and families will get to greet them then.

Other demob ceremonies, with information subject to change:

Portland: 2 p.m. Wednesday at the University of Portland's Chiles Center, 5000 N Willamette Blvd.

Eugene: 1:30 p.m. Friday at Lane County Fairgrounds, 796 W 13th Ave.

Medford: 3 p.m. Saturday at Spiegelberg Stadium, 815 S Oakdale Ave.; 3 p.m. April 27 at Medford Armory, 1701 S Pacific Highway

The first ones are back!

My BFF Jess and her husband, Eric, were in Sisters, Ore., during the weekend, and they caught a celebration for the first Oregon Guardsmen heading home after leaving Joint Base Lewis-McChord.

Photos by Jessica Banister

It's official

Adam is no longer in Iraq. Operation Homecoming has begun.

The beginning of the end

Some members of the 41st are already at Joint Base Lewis-McChord, the combination of what were Fort Lewis and McChord Air Force Base. It doesn't seem real that they are, in fact, coming home.

One month left

This is it. This is the final stretch. The 41st Infantry Brigade Combat Team is expected home mid-April. I did not start a countdown and do not plan to start one because I think that would make the days longer. I want to go through each day and then, "Boom!" we're there.

Everything is winding down over there. The guys have started packing their belongings, and they are moving to tents soon to prepare for the next wave of soldiers. Though no one wants to move, I think in a way they are glad because that is an indication that they are coming home soon.

Every now and then, it hits me that it's been a year, and I'm amazed. When he left, I thought to myself, "A year is nothing." I truly believe that. Anyone can do anything for a year. It's no big deal. But I still tell myself, "A year is nothing," except it is no longer a year. It is a month. I think that actually keeps my anticipation down, so I am not driven crazy by the fact that it's soon. I prefer that so I don't have to freak out every day, "He's coming home soon, he's coming home soon, he's coming home soon!"

I don't anticipate that our adjustment period will be too difficult. Adam doesn't seem to have changed much. I think I'm fairly the same. We're pretty independent, so it's not as though our other half has been missing for a year -- we're two full pieces that have been apart, and it will be great to put them next to each other again. :)

Light at the end of the tunnel

Adam is frustrated. Deployment is getting old. Boredom persists when there are no missions. Questionable decisions by superiors are annoying. He is, in one word, tired.

But it is almost over. The "sure-ish" date for flying out is April 12. They are supposed to fly directly from Iraq to Fort Lewis, Wash. Adam said they will be "prisoners" at Fort Lewis, and he is aggravated by that because apparently regular Army people will not be treated that way.

I fear for his mind. He is agitated. He is frustrated. He appears disenchanted. I don't want him to resent something he loves.

He will be gone a good chunk of the summer, squeezing in classes before the fiscal year ends. I am somewhat disappointed but at the same time glad that he will be furthering his career. In a way, it's good that he's doing this right after deployment because I'm already used to him being gone. We will have time, because he doesn't plan to go back to work until June.

Today is the last day to send anything. I plan to send one more letter, then wait for him to come home.

These days are rough

Patricia gave me a copy of Military Spouse magazine, and I couldn't read it without wanting to cry. There is an article about three World War II vets who visit the airport every day to great service members coming home. They are getting older. One has cancer. Another walks with a cane. But they go every day, and they get there early and watch for planes all day. I nearly started bawling reading the article.

I don't think a service member ever stops being a service member, no matter how long he or she serves. There is something different about them, the drive to help, the kindness in their eyes. It's innate.

I feel the safest when I am with Adam. It's not only that he's a good shot. He's also attentive, aware. I'm pretty oblivious. I'm surprised I've never been mugged (knock on wood). When we are out, he watches out for me. He looks for sketchy men eyeing me. He protects me. He ensures I'm all right 24/7.

I've been unsettled lately. I've been more crabby, more irritated, more detached. Maybe deployment is finally getting to me. Oddly, we won't be apart much longer, yet I'm feeling blue.

Demobilization

Adam's parents and I attended a six-hour meeting Sunday about demobilization. Officially, the return date is between April and June, but I received information otherwise that they will leave Iraq early April.

The first stop is Fort Lewis, Wash., where they will fill out demobilization papers, prepare for return to society, etc. That is expected to last about five days. Family and friends are highly encouraged NOT to go to Fort Lewis because it is unlikely the guys will get a pass, even on the weekend. Adam is not happy about this news. He thought there would be time for us to visit while he's there.

After that, they will travel back to Oregon, where there will be a demobilization ceremony. They will still be on orders but on leave, unless they choose to cash in their remaining leave time. (Adam intends to take the leave and get paid an extra two weeks.) From there on, deployment is officially over.

The closer it gets, the harder it becomes. I am getting antsy. I was fine through most of the deployment, but lately I am sadder, missing him more. At the same time, I cannot believe he will be home so soon, and I wonder where the time went.

On another note, Adam said the last day to send anything is March 1. That is an estimate, but it is a safe deadline to ensure he receives the item.

Thank you again for everyone's support. This journey is almost over.

Happy birthday, Adam!

My favorite soldier and boyfriend (haha, that implies I have more than one) turns 28 today. To celebrate, Patricia and I plan to go to dinner. Don't worry, we'll make it up to him when he gets home. :)

I completely lost it over a TV show

Last night, I watched an episode of "Cold Case" in which a soldier was murdered two days before his deployment to Iraq. It's not real, yet I started crying. It had nothing to do with his murder. It had to do with his pure love for the Army, for the young people he was recruiting.

He was injured during a tour in Afghanistan, so he came home and was assigned to be a recruiter. He took it seriously, but the war weighed on him. A comrade died after they were both shot, and he blamed himself because he tried to save him and couldn't. He felt guilt for surviving. His wife tried desperately to understand that he wasn't the same person anymore.

I don't know why it took a fictitious TV show for me to break down. I'm not worried that Adam will be a completely different person, but I know he has changed. I wonder what goes through his mind, and I'll never know. No matter how much combat one sees, war changes a person.

I can't pinpoint what part of the episode affected me most, only that all of the topics discussed hit home.

Three more months

Seriously, can you believe it? Adam told me he is estimated to leave Iraq mid-April. He won't be completely done because there will still be a demobilization process, but he should be stateside no later than late April.

Family and friends, get ready for the reunion party. ;)

Taking on more responsibilities

Adam successfully commanded his first mission. For the most part, he said, he was calm and easygoing. There were times when he had to get tough to get some guys in line, but he said no one complained about his performance as a leader. Responsibilities such as this will prepare him to cover for Nate as squad leader when Nate goes on leave. Adam enjoyed leading the mission but said it put more pressure and stress on him because any problem was on him to fix.

I am proud of him for doing this because I know of his capabilities as a leader. At 27 -- 28 in two weeks! -- he has been in the military for 10 years. Oddly, this is his first deployment, and I'm not sure how he got away with not deploying for so long. But for a relatively young person, he has had a lot of training, so I'm glad he is getting to challenge himself and put his skills to good use.

Good job, baby! :)